Sales conversations always start with the right intent in mind (at least in my happy place they do)—figure out the problem, put a recommendation together, connect the dots so that my prospect believes in the value I will bring to the situation. Somewhere in that stream of events it seems that things go awry.

Our focus and intent goes away from helping our prospect. Suddenly, we’re more concerned about being right—concerned about beating the competition—concerned about getting our way—concerned about looking good to everyone BUT the prospect.

Who loses in this situation? Is it you, the competition, the opposing viewpoint? No. It’s the person that had the problem to begin with. When we lose our intent on fixing problems and instead focus on being right, the person we set out to help doesn’t get the best of us.

Remember what you’re “fighting” for. If you’re fighting to “get,” the majority of the time you’ll lose.

Here’s my take on how we should be working the recession for all it’s worth:

•    Workforce: What a perfect time to get rid of your underperformers. You can’t afford not to be getting the highest return on your investments on your most expensive assets—your people. They say the cream rises to the top. In hard times, other stuff floats to the top. Ever heard the expression “turds in a punch bowl”? I don’t think I need to say more.
•    Training: For your peak performers, now is a great time to give them an edge. Maybe it’s outside training, coaching, or cross training within your organization. Truly turn your team into a lean machine. If you’re not green and growing, you’re ripe and rotting. (I think Einstein said that.)
•    New ideas: Have you been sitting on a new, innovative approach to your market place? Have you been thinking “the same stuff is still working, I’m going to keep doing it”? I would guess the “same stuff” isn’t working anymore. Whip out those new ideas. Take a chance. Think outside the box. If not now, when?
•    Clients: Take care of what you have. When’s the last time you asked your current clients what challenges they have, even if it doesn’t have anything to do with something you can sell them? How can you bring more value to your relationship? Have you surveyed them? Asked them about their dreams and goals? Or, have you been taking them to lunch once per month and talking about your kids because “that’s what we always do.” Tisk, tisk.

What’s your new normal? What’s your strategy to survive and thrive?

I rushed home—a 5 hour drive—very emotional. I got to the hospital just in time for the doctor to share the process of the surgery with me, my Mom and my sister. And that’s when it hit me. The (instant) minute the doctor laid out his process, our minds went from emotional to logical.

AHHHHHH, relief.

We preach “process” like crazy when working with our clients. It’s all you’ve got really.  You can’t control outcomes or people, but you can control your “process.” Just like the doctor. Now, the sales process isn’t surgery, but it (can be) is very emotional—both for the seller and the buyer.

Have you incorporated elements of your sales process to calm the emotion of the buyer?

Do you treat your sales process as a way to calm the emotion of your buyer? No one likes surprises. Your prospect is looking to you as the expert. You must lead them!

Your process should include a step to get both your head and your prospect’s head in the right place. Do you both feel safe? Do you want to share information? Is your intent to help or to wring them dry of money, time and resources? Do you know how to really communicate how you work with your clients (and get paid for it)? How is their life better with you in it? Do your prospects know the cost of their problem? Better yet, do you know how to help them figure that out? And do you have a procedure for all of these things?

If you want to make a huge impact in the lives of your prospects and clients, handle them with care. Keep them okay by having a process, walking them through it, and trusting that it is the best way to do what you do.

I realized, when thinking about what I wanted to share, the biggest whale that I have to conquer (almost on a daily basis), is the crap that I put in my head—how I speak to myself, how I think about myself, how I don’t trust myself.

I think all of us struggle with feelings of “enough.” As children, I believe most of us feel nothing but AWESOME and more than enough. Unfortunately, life kind of beats that out of us.

So, how do these thoughts show up in my life? I’m not present. I don’t take risks. It keeps my gifts from the world. They keep me “stuck.” I am sometimes afraid of my life’s potential.

When I realized it was a line of bull that I was feeding myself, I dipped my toe into the joy that is available when you let go of fear and doubt. I started my career at Caskey that I am in love with; I give all that I am to my clients and honor the trust that they have put in me to help them grow their businesses. I remarried and had a child (something I thought I didn’t want). I laugh—A LOT! I surround myself with a magical circle of friends that push me to be more of who I am.

It’s not easy. Here are some things that I would encourage you to do if you struggle with a whale of your own.

• Just do it! Do not procrastinate or self-edit. I will be now. I am now.
• Train to be strong in all ways: mentally, spiritually, physically. If you don’t, you won’t be able to take on all of the things you are capable of.
• Embrace chaos and joy—especially yours. Life is absurd, you might as well laugh at it.

A lot of the push for me came from reading a book by Michael Port, The Think Big Manifesto. There is a great quote in the book:

“I will be comfortable with who I am right now and know that I am good enough. I will use my talents and gifts to do big things in the world. I will not give up in the face of fear or disbelief – mine or others.”

What is your whale?

But, that doesn’t mean I’m not above continuous learning. I learned a great lesson from one of these extraordinary clients about how actions sometimes scream so much louder than words.

Here is what you need to know:

• My client is part of a HUGE organization. One of those organizations that everyone wants on their resume. (I know, it makes me happy!)
• The vendor had all of my client’s business. Probably upwards of $250,000 of annual revenue. I don’t care who you are, that’s a nice piece of biz!
• The vendor made a pretty major mistake. Apologized. Proceeded to make the exact SAME mistake again within a couple of months. OOPS.

So, there’s the background.

Shortly after the second “oops,” my client was asking for contributions to the company’s holiday party from all of their valued partners. Of course, they asked this particular vendor to help them, as well. Look at the 3 points above, really look at them.

Okay, now that you have the background clear in your head, what do you suppose they contributed—electronics, trips, major $$ gift cards?  Nope, you’ll never guess. They donated 2 cookie platters—nothing fancy, not even with cookies, just the platters.

Is it me?

Here is the lesson (in case you haven’t picked up on it already).

• My client isn’t about being bought by vendors. I don’t want you to miss the point. What he is about is feeling important and valued. Cookie platters don’t cut it.
• You can say “thanks” and “I’m sorry” until the cows come home.  Do you say them with the intent that lets your client know it’s from your heart and not because it’s what you’re supposed to do?
• PAY ATTENTION!!!  Don’t make your clients a “to do” on your task list. Think about them often. Care about them. Be generous with them if you value them. This doesn’t necessarily mean in dollars. Be generous with your brain power, your time, your gratitude and appreciation.

It all started when I took the giant leap to follow my passion and come to work with Bill Caskey and Bryan Neale as a consultant and trainer. I had enjoyed a successful career in logistics with a company and people that I loved. But, as sometimes happens, you get pulled by an undeniable force to do something new.

It took me a year to make the decision, but I finally did it. You have to understand that with that decision came a clean slate—no clients, no income. My family and I were okay with that because we had planned accordingly. What is it they say ”the best laid plans”? Yeah, one week into my “dream” my husband was laid off. So, welcome to my personal recession.

No income. No benefits.

Oh, and did I mention it was one week before Thanksgiving!

Don’t get me wrong, the “fond” feelings were not immediate. There were feelings of panic and fear. We let ourselves live that for about two days, but then it was time to get on with it. I’m happy to say that my husband found a job within three weeks, and I landed my first client within three months. So what does this have to do with our country’s current situation and our place in it? The value is in the lessons that I learned and how I experienced my life during this tough time.

1. We were PRESENT. When you don’t know what the future holds, you tend to live in the present—appreciating, hearing, feeling everything that is now. Sometimes we get so busy we go on autopilot. We don’t remember half of what we feel, think or experience during our day. I was a nicer person.
2. We appreciated EVERYTHING. We made our choices about how to spend our money very carefully. If we went to a movie with our son, we really made a big deal about it. It was an event. Something so simple is so special if you are present. Starbucks becomes a treat and not a medication. Long walks became a time to explore, talk.
3. Speaking of money. It was the first time, in a long time, that we paid attention—what was going out, what was coming in, what we owed, what we bought. This period of time made us financially healthy. We actually paid off more debt and saved more money. We realized how spoiled we are and how little we really need to live a great life.
4. We needed each other. I felt like my husband, son and I were a pack that couldn’t be infiltrated. No worry, no bad feelings—we were going to get through this. They were my rock, my place of shelter.

My hope during this time is that we can get back to the simple things—respecting, caring and helping our neighbors. Mostly, when we come out of this, which we will, I hope we remember the good things.

This is not the time to panic. In fact, it’s a great time to gain clarity and work smart.

When is the last time you looked at your network and used it to grow your business? I know you might have a lot of “business friends” and clients that love you—you go to lunch, you invite them to a sporting event, meet with them once a month to take care of business. When was the last time you asked them to help you grow your business? I don’t mean the casual “Hey, if you know of anyone else I should be talking to…” I mean, giving them a process from start to finish that puts you in front of qualified prospects. I’ve recorded the steps in an audio. Take a minute to listen.

They arrived in private jets (3 separate flying from the same origin to the same destination), no plan, no notes, no nothing but a huge sense of ENTITLEMENT. What really amazed me is their astonishment that Congress sent them away and said “try again.”

It reminded me of a large number of salespeople out in the marketplace—those that love the hunt, but suck at the management of clients and their business.

Now more than ever, you have to be a great relationship manager. This is not the time to take your business or your clients for granted. As tight as everyone is holding onto their money, there are that many (or more) hungry salespeople out there targeting your customers.

As a salesperson, what should you always be doing to keep your clients engaged?

• Treat every interaction as if it’s your first. Stay curious.
• Continue meeting more people within the organization that are impacted by what you do. There is no longer “A” decision maker.
• Be clear on identifying and communicating the value of what you do. This isn’t about your “stuff”—it’s about you.
• Continue asking questions that allow people to talk to you about their problems. You make more money when you solve more problems.
• Keep your intent about helping your client, not selling more stuff.

The 3-day event started with an expert summit. The presenters and a few invited guests were given time to present on a subject where they have expertise. As some of you may know, I have an “alter ego,” the Ultimate Sales Chick. I do a podcast (listen at www.ultimatesaleschick.com), so I did my best to teach the ins and outs of podcasting. The other women shared wisdom on everything from writing your first book, to really understanding who you know and how to leverage your connections.

The next 2 days were spent in breakout sessions, either teaching or attending. What a blast! I taught on the power of personal value in the sales process. I didn’t realize how ironic that would be.

To be honest, at first I shied away from presenting at the conference. Wouldn’t we all be teaching the same thing? How much value could there be in each of us putting our thoughts and feelings behind our subject matter? I know, maybe I should start drinking my own Kool-Aid!

I learned some huge tactical lessons, but, more importantly, I learned some huge life lessons:

1. Every woman had the intent to help the other participants—no ego, no ulterior motives.
2. There was an ABUNDANCE of knowledge and an unending generosity to share it.
3. Because we are all very different, each lesson was unique. I heard lead generation discussed in 3 different ways and took something different from each!

What can you take from this, especially in crappy times like this when we tend to feel a bit nervous, desperate and worried? Go serve! Go talk to other people you may be able to help or connect. Heck, go talk to your competitors. Think outside the box.

My personal values (and yours) make our products unique. Don’t bury your head in the sand. Learn from the wisdom around you. Celebrate it. Share it.

It comes back tenfold.

Why is that?

Here’s the reason. Your prospect will always try to make their purchase logical (price), but we know that people buy for emotional reasons (how can this fix a problem for me or help me to do my job better). So, when you call them back and give them a price without getting the scoop, you’re making their decision logical and your product a commodity.

A major part of the foundation of what we teach at Caskey is about intent. Our intent should always be to HELP, not sell something. If our intent is to help the guy who thinks he’s looking for a price, does throwing a number at him really help him solve anything? NO.

What should you do?

• Ask him “Why?” Why is he looking to purchase the product?
• What is the problem he is trying to fix?
• What has he tried to do in the past?
• How long has it been a problem?
• Does he know how much the problem is “costing” him (this is the $64,000.00 question)?
• What happens if he doesn’t fix it?

There are a thousand more questions to ask, but this gets you started.  You have to keep your intent in check.

Remember, it’s never really about price for the prospect. It’s a belief issue, belief that they have a problem that has to be fixed, belief that they want to invest money to fix it and belief that you’re the person that can help them do that.

Keeping your intent in check, asking the tough questions and working on the REAL problem will make price almost irrelevant—if you can help them realize that the cost of their problem is more than the price of your solution.

The only way you get to that part of the conversation is not commoditizing yourself by throwing out a price before you have the whole story.